How to be Bald

Be bold while bald

There are worse things than losing your hair and that’s losing your head.  Make sure you keep that one screwed on.  By the way don’t try anything stupid like getting yourself scalped.  You are unlikely to recover your hair for the time being.   Last I heard there is no insurance against hair loss.

I was born bald and to baldness I shall go.  Being bald is like being single: we are born that way.  If you are going bald right now, as I am, it is an experience akin to reverting to your baby days.  Conversely, so it is losing your teeth.   I do have an advantage over some guys though: I don’t expect to switch to diapers any time soon.

You can remedy the situation at one of the gentlemen clubs , hair saloons, and the like .  Expect to get your hair piece in one of two editions : ridiculous and laughable, or at best mug shot perfect. I am simply curious that after centuries of scientific and technologic progress and awesome feats of beautification products (plastic surgery, nose jobs, boob jobs, butt lifts, etc.) no one has come up with a credible wig to the satisfaction of most. Why do you suppose that all his billions can not make this guy’s head look half way decent :

trump

Even if you manage to take your hair two meters down there and you end up looking like something out of the Shaun of the Dead , rest assured the drive of decay will leave you scalped so that your grave will always contain a bald version of you, with no posterity to witness it.   Praise God.

zombie2

Better bald than dead.

If you are reading this and are already going bald or you are passed the point of no return, have the courage to get to old age in a rather gracious way rather than pout and throw a pity party of bitterness and anger.  Remember, sometimes the best path through a storm is right through it.

God Bless

 

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