Why Having a Puppy is the Best Next Thing Should You Remain Single for a While or Remain Single Permanently

My late Puppy, Esmal-e, February, 2014. Miss you friend.

My late Puppy, Esmal-e, February, 2014. Miss you friend.

Tired of breakups, disillusionment, exhaustion, cynicism, and pessimism at the dating and relationship rat race?  Are you yearning for people to stopt disliking you, disrespecting you, and despising you? Then consider getting yourself some dog company.  In the millennia long process of human progress and evolution, the dog-man parity has yet to be improved, not because of a lack of genius , but because dogs unlike Homo sapiens, seem endowed with the natural affinity for avoiding screwing up relationships. 

  • Human relationships are sometimes very one sided.  Not like a Tango, but like a Mango whose sole purpose is to serve someone’s hunger and pleasure .  Mango gets nothing.  Has anybody ever had to contend with a dog with a sense of entitlement who gave nothing back?
  • Human relationships tend to degrade.  Couples therapy. Who ever  heard of man-dog counseling !  Given the right ( or wrong!) parameters people in human relationships may end up killed, maimed, or insane. 
  • Breakups and divorce are an ever present possibility.  It’s a toss for many.  
  • Puppy love is the most unconditional type of love.  There are no sanctification requirements.
  • Puppies will never try to change you.  
  • Puppies can tolerate a hefty amount of s—t, literal and metaphorical. I mean , they can both flash a wry grin and stand besides you while you are busy at your toilet . 
  • Puppies will always greet you, sniff you , lick your crotch, and get excited for the simple reason that it is you!  No need for a big house , designer clothes, BMW’s, or a fat 401K.
  • People often get hinged with undefined or rather ambiguous goals and expectations.  With a puppy at your side all the guesswork and hassle will be taken out.  You WILL know exactly what you are getting. 
  • Puppies communicate , like 101% of the time.  
  • Have an ugly , unruly puppy?Try obedience school to remedy the situation.  The costs are lower and the recidivism less likely than for sending your crush to psyachtry, rehab, or behavior modification at the next State Penitentiary. 
  • Puppies love simply.
  • You will never know a better , purer form of loyalty until you try puppy love. 

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